dickfiguresfanonfandomcom-20200214-history
Chick Figures Fanon Edition
'Summary' In this Chick Figures episode, we see what the Fanon characters would look like if they were Gender-Bent. 'Characters' *Rachel *Brittany *Sarah *Harold *Salem *Daryl *Bitch *Professor Chick *James *Fofo *Lassy *Ryanna *Kimono *Leshawna *Delia *Haze *Felisa *Jack *Jill *Adam *Stephanie *Jamie Bauer *Braseph *Scarlet *Lavender *Lord Tourettes 'Transcript' (Rachel was lying on her couch. Sarah walks in.) Sarah: Rachel! There you are! What's with all the dead people in here?! Rachel: Get over it bitch! It's my thing, okay?! Sarah: Don't forget we have a party to go to, remember? I have to meet Harold there! Rachel: Pfft, just go without me to meet your dick boyfriend. Sarah: Fuck you. (walks out) Rachel: (shoots a person outside) Give it time. (Meanwhile at the party.) Stephanie: (Drunk on the couch) This party is my shit! Adam: Steph, really? We just got here! Stephanie: Whatever, this party got started right when I got here. (Adam faceplams) Braseph: (comes up to Salem) Sup bro? Feelin' sexy tonight? Salem: (blushes) S-Sexy? ...I guess so. Braseph: (laughs) That's my boy right there. (kisses his cheek) Stephanie: Ew! Get a room! (Throws up next to them) Salem: S-Sorry... Braseph: You need a chill pill, man. Adam: STEPH!! Lord Tourettes: You ruined my brother's FUCK moment! Daryl: (teleports behind them) Oh! How precious~! Braseph: Daryl. Nice of you to show up... Daryl: Why thanks, Bro-Bro. (points somewhere off-screen) I see that your kitten showed up as well. (Felisa meows) Adam: That kitten who causes bad luck!? (Hides behind the couch) Sarah: (arrives to the party) Finally! I made it! Stupid Rachel, making me be late! Stephanie: Rachel's here! Who's gonna die now? Rachel: (crashes through the window, as glass shards fall on Stephanie) You now bitch. (drinks) Stephanie: Whatever, I still wanna a drink. (Stephanie grabs another beer bottle and chugs it) Bitch: Please bitch, I could do so much better. Adam: (Comes out of the couch) (Deadpanned) Hey bitch. Bitch: Hey A-DUMB! (laughs) (Adam rolls his eyes) Stephanie: Ha! you got served Adam! (Falls drunk on him) Harold: Aah Sarah! There you are! Thank god you didn't miss the party. Sarah: (seductively) Never for you my beautiful boy. Adam: (sighs) Those two are so happy. Bitch: Get a room you fuckers. Adam: Bitch, shut up! (picks up a drunk Stephanie) Bitch: Says you A-Dumb. Stephanie: At least his name doesn't sound like a name that's true to someone. (Pukes on Bitch) Bitch: Eww, gross! Stephanie: (Burps more on Bitch) Now your a ratchet bitch. (Giggles) James: (waits in the corner) Where is she?! (sighs) Adam: Who? James: Sakura! My newly met girlfriend? Adam: You have a girlfriend? (Lets go of Stephanie and she falls on Bitch) Dude, that's nice. (High fives James) Sakura: (comes in on her skateboard) Hi Jimmy poo! (kisses his cheek) James: Sak! Please, don't talk like that in front of my friends... Rachel: (laughs) Please Ryanna, you'd never beat me at a fight! Ryanna: Really? (prepares to fight) Cause I was thinking of doing it right now. (Leshawna watches and face palms.) Leshawna: Idiots. Stephanie: (Gets up) (To Leshawna) Why are you so down? People are fighting! Tear this shit up! Leshawna: Ugh, fine. (grows out her claws) Stephanie: (Eyes glow) Oh my! This is going to be fun! (Stephanie was almost shot in the face, the women who almost shot her was none other than Danielle) Adam: Who the fuck was that!? Stephanie: That was exciting! Danielle: Mind if I join? Adam: If you don't kill anyone, then yes. Rachel: Nah! Kills for EVERYONE! Adam: Steph, let's get out of this. (Picks up Stephanie and they both sit on the couch) Stephanie: So Adam, where's your little boyfriend Haze? Adam: He's not my boyfriend, he's just a close friend alright? Stephanie: Whatever queer. (Drinks a beer bottle) Haze: Hey Adam. (to Stephanie) Sup Stephenie. Adam: Hey Haze! Stephanie: You boys gonna kiss? (Laughs) Harold: This girl is starting to piss me off. Sarah: Tell me about it. Sakura: Jimmy, I think toy should leave before things get outta hand. Adam: Yeah, Haze, maybe you, me and Steph better get out before something strange happens. James: Yeah, I'm gonna go. Adam: At least you have a decent girlfriend. I'm stuck dragging this chick everywhere I go. (Points to Stephanie puking more on Bitch) Rachel: Please, that's nothing compared to the boy I have, I hope his sexy ass makes it here. Stephanie: (Get up) (To Rachel) What? Really girl? You got yourself some dick? Rachel: (shoots Stephanie's legs) That isn't as bitchy as you. Daryl: Don't wait so patiently, dear. He won't be coming for quite a while thanks to that SLUT, Dawn Fire. Stephanie: (In pain) What the fuck!? Rachel: That's for... pretty much everything you've caused here. (walks away) Professor Chick: (checks her books) Is something like this possible? For a couch to levitate in the air? Not possible! Salem: (nervous) Should we run? Braseph: Uhh, perhaps maybe? (Suddenly Jack comes flying through the window) Jack: Relax guys! That was just from me Jack, and Jill. Jill: (Floats out of the next room) I got ya bitches, suck it! Brittany: Remember girls, we sneak in and make sure Rachel doesn't kill us, remember? Street Gang Members: Got it. Fofo: Hey buddy buds how is everyone doing on this cookie day? Brittany: (blushes) Uhh, good sweetie pie. Gang Member: Come on Brittany! We have a party to rob! Fofo: Hey dudettes. Lets all go to the soda shop to have a soda pop Brittany: Maybe after you help us rob a party? Fofo: Woo a party lets go! I want to hit the pinata! Brittany: Then let's go! (they climb up the building. It cuts back to the party) Rachel: Aww fuck! Where's the booze! Lassy: Here are the beer ya wee galoots! Rachel: (giggles) Lassy, your too kind. (smashes some bottles) Lassy: So what brings you to the party tonight? Rachel: Eeeh, some party for Sarah's gay ass boyfriend. Lassy: Well if you want to get Drunk then you where to find me wee lass. Rachel: Kay bitch! (drinks) Jamie Bauer: (comes in up to Lassy) Hello Lassy. Lassy: Oi Jamie! What will it be, the usual? Jamie Bauer: You know me. Lassy: Pina Colada, Shaken not stirred. Jack: By the way, we saw some thugs coming here, I thought I might warn you, (Pulls out machine gun) just in case. Jill: For sure! Salem: Thugs?! Why would they come here? Jill: Cause they're looking for money, to kill, why the fuck wouldn't they? Brittany: (breaks in and pulls a machine gun out) NOBODY MOVE! This is a robbery! Adam: Holy shit! (Grabs Stephanie and hides behind the kitchen counter) Jack: YES! Now we can have some fun! Jill: Not before I do! (Uses her laser eye and hits a gang member) Brittany: Fofo! Distract them! Fofo: Cookies for everyone! (throws a bunch of cookies at them) Rachel: EEEUGH! Terminate the bastards! Stephanie: Yay! Flying cookies! (Pukes next to Adam) Adam: (holds a pistol) What does this do? (Shoots a gang member in the head) Oh shit! (Continues to hide) (Ryanna runs by with Kimono, Leshawna, and Haze) Kimono: What's going on here? Jamie Bauer: What's going on here? Sarah: (hides behind a couch with Harold) Brittany and her stupid gang are ambushing this party! Jamie Bauer: (Sighs) I'll try to stop this. (goes to the gang) Hey can you girls stop fighting? we're trying to have a good time here. Jack: Like that'll really help? (Snaps a gang members neck) Jamie Bauer: Look I am off duty and the last thing I want is to let this get out of hand to force me back on duty. So how about you children play nice? Brittany: (to Jamie Bauer) You can't do shit old bitch (tries shooting her) Jill: What a party pooper! (Uses her telekinesis to throw the couch at the gang members and breaks through the windows) Jamie Bauer: (presses a button on her watch to zap the bullet away) Guess we have to do this the hard way. (In less than a second Jamie disarms Brittany and breaks the gun down to pieces) Last warning. Brittany: Never! (continues ambushing the party) Leshawana: (sighs) Never mind. (grows out claws to kill the other gang members) Rachel: And that's just so lame. (shoots some gang members and cuts them) (Felisa approaches a gang member) Gang Member: Pfft, it's just a cat! What's she gonna do? Scratch me? (Felisa meows and the member's gun suddenly blows up in her face.) Adam: (Faceplams) Idiot. Jack: Okay, are we going to shoot some shit or what!? Rachel: Mind if I join in? (shoots some Gang Members) Jack: Nice! (Shoots some Gang Members) Salem: (takes out his taser) I'll join in for the heck of it. (shocks a member) Jill: Now it's a party! (Uses her telekinesis to throw some gang members around) (Lavender and Scarlet walk in.) Lavender: Finally! We made it to the- (They notice the big gun fight.) Scarlet; Uhh, maybe we should go to a bar instead? Lavander: Yeaahh... (slowly shuts the door.) Adam: (Nervous) Steph, what do we do? Stephanie: I don't know. (Throws her empty beer bottle at Rachel's head) Adam: WHY!!! (Rachel angrily takes the bottle out of her head and stabs Stephanie's chest with it.) Stephanie: (Angry) You stupid cunt! (Tackles Rachel) Rachel: You just signed a death warrent! Ryanna: Ah HELL NO! (prepares to fight) (Jamie Throws her watch in the group of the gang) Gang Member: Ha what is that going to do? (The watch quickly transforms into a car and pushes the gang into a wall) Jamie Bauer: I tried to help. (Gets her silencers and starts making one shot head shots at each Gang member) Jill: How many fucking gang members are there? Adam: (Sighs) I never understand women. Bitch: I love this party. (chokes a gang member) Gang Member: I can't believe you'd try to kill a girl! Bitch: Whatever bitch. Jack: (Shoots a shotgun and makes a gang member's head explode) So wait, why is this chick? (Points to Britney) here to kill us? Adam: (To Harold and Sarah) This party is so crazy! Sarah: Why won't it end? Harold: Because some people are dicks. (Ryanna kills the gang members with her own fighting style) Brittany: Cuz I'm here to steal for our street! Jill: Can't you stay on your own fucking street? Brittany: No! Shut up! (tries shooting Jill) Jill: I don't think so! (Levitates the bullets and aims them back at Britney) Brittany: Oh shit... (Brittany gets hit by the bullets as she and her gang members get killed) Jack: That's my girl! (Highs fives Jill as he then shoots another gang member in the head) Jill: And, your welcome you motherfuckers! Brittany: This- (coughs) Won't be the last time we- (Rachel stomps on Brittany's face) Rachel: Brittany, get a fucking life. Ryanna: Ha! You got owned BITCH! Fofo: (Walks casually through the gun fire while eating a box of cookies) I didn't know it was fouth of July. Rachel: This was the best party I ever had! Sarah: And our moment was RUINED! Harold: (sighs) There's always next month. Stephanie: (Drunk) I want some cookies. (Gets up and takes some from Fofo) Adam: I just want to go home. Stephanie: And I just want to fuck you hard! (Drunk kisses Adam) James: I want to go home... Kimono: Yeah, I gotta get back to my Jimmy pie. Jack: (Smirks) Jimmy pie? Kimono: Yeah. Jill: Sounds like something a mother would say. (Laughs) Leshawna: Oh my god. James: (feels embarrased) Kimono: (to Jill) What's wrong with saying cute names? Jill: Because it makes you sound like a pussy. Rachel: YOUR a pussy. (throws Felisa into Jill's face) (Ryanna laughs) (Jill dodges Felisa and it hits James) Kimono: Oh my god Jimmy pie! (runs to help him) (James takes Felisa off him with a pissed off face) Adam: That cat just brings bad luck everywhere. Jill: Whoops. (Laughs nervously) Delia: (to Jill) You should run. Jill: Nah, I'll just fly. (Floats) Rachel: Use this. (gives James a large rock) James: Thanks! (throws it at Jill, who falls to the ground knocked out) OH! (punches Rachel) And that was for throwing it! Ryanna: Oh-HO! BURN BITCH! Jack: (To Jill) You okay? Jill: (Wakes up in a little pain) Sure, I'm fine. (Picks up James with her telekinesis) Now I'm so much better! Rachel: WHOOO! ANOTHER PARTY FIGHT! (randomly punches Ryanna) Adam: (To Stephanie) We should go. Stephanie: No way, this is getting much better! Ryanna: Nice try bitch. (throws Rachel) Rachel: Nah, nice try for YOU! (tackles Ryanna) Professor Chick: This was a disturbing party. I guess next time I should stay home. Salem: Oh my god... (face palms) Daryl: Kids, these days. (dissapears) Jill: So where's my new buddy Bitch at? (Whistles for him) (cuts down to Bitch with all the party gifts) Bitch: Some people never remember to guard gifts. (laughs) (END) 'Trivia' *List of characters in their gender-bent forms **Rapper = Rachel **Bruce = Brittany **Steve = Sarah **Holly = Harold **Wednesday = Salem **Darla = Daryl **Bitchess = Bitch **Professor Stick = Professor Chick **Jess = James **Fifi = Fofo **Lad = Lassy **Ryle = Ryanna **Spark = Kimono **Shawn = Leshawna **Damon = Delia **Violet = Haze **Fresko = Felisa **Jade = Jack **Jones = Jill **Alice = Adam **Simon = Stephanie **James Bauer = Jamie Bauer *Jade and Jones's gender-bent names are based off the names of the book/movie 'Jack & Jill'. 'Poll' What do you think about this Chick Figures Fanon Edition? Terrible, I hated it. (1/5) It was okay, I guess. (2/5) Good, but not great. (3/5) Now this is cool. (4/5) THIS IS AN AWESOME EPISODE!! (5/5) Category:Episodes Category:May Releases